Persistence – powering through to your goal

We all like to cheer for the underdog. You know, the kid who isn’t the fastest runner, or the best shot, the smartest student or the greatest singer but, by continuing to work, becomes a success. She doesn’t get there on pure talent, but because she won’t give up. There is a word for that trait: persistence.

This ability to keep going, even when the deck seems to be stacked against you, is perhaps one of the most valuable habits, and the biggest component of success, there is. President Calvin Coolidge said, “The slogan ‘press on’ has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.”

But persistence, as with so many things, must be cultivated. A natural reaction to challenge is to give up. After all, the easier path is less work, and few people are born wanting to work hard every day. But for people who learn the power of persistence often find success beyond anything they ever thought of.

No matter your level of natural talent or education, your child is going to run into stumbling blocks. By teaching them how to persevere and keep going now, you will prepare them for that point in his life when things don’t come so easily.

Here are some tips to teaching kids how to stick with it.

1.     Provide encouragement. Kids need to hear that you know things are hard and maybe they aren’t having as much success as they thought they would. But they also need to hear you tell them to not give up. Have them imagine the end goal and visualize themselves succeeding. Thinking about how good it will feel to reach that goal can help them power through. In addition, when you see others showing persistence, point it out and talk about it. Discuss how you child can learn to use the same techniques to achieve her own goals.

2.     Be a role model. It sounds like repetition, but it’s true. Children will learn as much, or more, from what you do as what you say. When you encounter challenges in your life, how do you react? Do you give up and walk away, or do you come up with new ways to approach the problem? Surround your child with other models of persistence. Maybe the baseball coach had to work through an injury or a teacher had to do extra studying to pass a tough test in her subject. These are the people who can reinforce the value of persistence.

3.     Be creative. Ben Franklin famously said that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results. Persistence doesn’t mean taking the exact same actions until you succeed; it means trying lots of different things on the way to success. If something isn’t working, help your child brainstorm new ways of tackling the problem. And if you see him changing his approach on his own, praise him. Nothing makes a kid feel more successful than a few well-placed words of praise from an adult, especially a parent.

4.     Praise the attitude. While you’re praising your child for trying new things, don’t forget to offer positive words for his general attitude. Hearing a parent recognize a persistent work ethic is one of the greatest steps to keeping it up. The praise doesn’t have to be extravagant. A simple, “One thing I know about you is that you stick with something until you’re successful” is more than sufficient. If your child knows you value her determination, she is more likely to keep it up.

5.     Be supportive. Not just physically, by offering assistance. Support your child emotionally by acknowledging that he is working hard. Often we just want to hear that others know we’re going through some challenges and it’s really hard work. Kids may even need to hear that the frustration they are feeling is a completely normal part of the process. If your child is having difficulty releasing that frustration, help her find positive ways of letting go of the negative so she can move forward. Knowing that other people see and recognize the frustration, and are there to help, will often provide the last push needed to achieve success.

Sometimes our goals come easily. But other times, more work is needed. But the saying is true – that the best things sometimes come hard. By helping your child cultivate a persistent frame of mind, you will equip him to meet life’s challenges head on – and maybe find even more success than he ever though of.

Oakmont Martial Arts licensed by the American Taekwondo Association, the premier North American organization dedicated to the martial arts discipline of taekwondo. They offer training for young children (Tiny Tigers, 3-5), youth (6-13), teens and adults, as well as adult fitness classes. Visitwww.OakmontMartialArts.com or their Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/ataOakmont) for more information, or call 412-826-8004 to schedule an introductory lesson.

A software technical writer by day, Mary Sutton is the mother of two teens and has been making her living with words for over ten years. She is the author of the Hero’s Sword middle-grade fantasy series, writing as M.E. Sutton, and The Laurel Highlands Mysteries police-procedural series, writing as Liz Milliron. Visit her online at www.marysuttonauthor.com.